Today was my second trip to the psychiatrist.
It was strange.
I started off by asking how long an initial visit usually lasts, saying that I felt my previous visit was very, very short. The doctor acted quite huffy and condescending in his answer, that it’s not about the clock and not really about me, but rather about him getting what information he needed–whether that takes 40 minutes or 1 1/2 hours.
OK.
We talked a bit about how things have gone since switching meds blah, blah, blah. The doctor asked about how much our health insurance was covering of my treatment. I explained our health coverage. He decided that he would give me a month’s worth of samples to keep trying the dosage and medication and give it a good run to see if it’s making a lasting impact.
As he handed me the month’s worth of samples he said, “I’m giving you about $200 worth of drugs here. This ought to make you feel guilty for the confrontation.”
I gasp-laughed out loud–as if I had just been punched in the stomach. I looked at him to see if he was smiling because I thought maybe he was good-naturedly joking with me. He wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t joking.
I can’t remember exactly what I said, but I said something like, “You really think I’m supposed to feel guilty about the confrontation?” But he didn’t answer.
Instead he sat down, turned his back to me and wrote on my charts for a while.
I sat there with my thoughts whirling:
- Did he really just say that to me?
- I want to get up and leave I am so offended.
- I think I’m going to cry. I will not cry, I will not cry.
- I could tell him I would rather not have guilt-riddled “free” samples and send him a message.
- Was I out of line to ask about the length of my first appointment and should I feel guilty? I don’t think so, but, why would he say that?
- #*%&$^!
- Maybe he’s had a really long and bad day.
It was just so stunningly odd. I cannot believe a doctor would say such a thing to a patient coming to him for help and treatment. Much less a mentally ill patient.
I keep telling myself that anyone else in this situation would have been reduced to tears. I was strong. I continued the session as if nothing had happened. And my 30 minute appointment was 40 minutes long.
I’m still unsettled and reeling from this interaction, but I know in a few days I won’t even give it a second thought.
um, I don’t really know a whole lot about anything, but I would think you need a new therapist cause this one sounds like a jackass. Child of God, but jackass. In my humble opinion.
I’m with Jill on this!
I agree with thediaperdiaries. I am sorry that you had that experience at your Dr office. But that doctor has no right to critize you like that. You are coming to HIM & paying your hard earned dollars and expect to be treated like a desent person. Yes, ok maybe he had a bad day-or you had a bad day-BUT that still dosen’t give him the right to treat you like that. It was nice that he gave you free samples, but he can get all the free samples that he wants from the drug reps!!! The woman that I am seeing for PPD refered me to a WONDERFUL psychiatrist, Dr David Vandervelde at Great Lakes Psychiatric off of East Paris, 616-454-2004. He’s wonderful for me. I have seen him 2x now and things are going well for me. Sorry to have such a long rant, but I feel if you reach out for help, you should be able to get help and not feel guilty, ashamed, depressed-you should feel like there is hope, light & goodness just over that mountian or around the corner…
Ok. No doctor should EVER guilt a patient. Especially a patient coming to him with depression as a mother when we already feel guilty day in and day out enough.
If you possible can with your insurance, find another doctor…
And then call the office and let them know that you’re taking yourself and your money to another practice and you think that should make him feel sufficiently guilty for being such a turd (all in a spirit of love, of course).
Yea, I’m with the other ladies, particularly Jill. Get out of there – go somewhere else. You deserve respect not condescencsion – good grief, how do you spell that? Go somewhere else. Not to mention, when you are paying him for precious time, you don’t need to spend it explaining your health coverage…he can look it up himself or have his staff do it. And to turn his back to you?? Yea, out of there, hon…NOW.
Through my work, I have a lot of contact with psychiatrists, and I’m here to tell you that most of them are diagnosable themselves, so finding a good doctor is essential.
He was way, way, way out of line. He felt that he was making things right by giving you free meds to make up for the lost time, but he was very snotty in the process. I agree with the other people, you need to find a new doctor.
I agree with everyone else here. That doctor was out of line!! Yes, he gets paid hundreds of dollars an hour for his expertise, and time is money, but if it weren’t for us, his patients, he would be getting nothing! How can he possibly say it really isn’t about YOU?? What a jerk! You definately need to find someone else that will listen to you.
Having said all that, in my journey with PostPartum issues, I have noticed a difference between Psychologists and Psychiatrists. This is not necessarily how it should be, but I have noticed that it is generally the -logists (whether they are MSW, CSW, PsyD) that are more about listening to you and having eye contact and a full 45 minute session.
The -trists seem just to want to know “just the facts” (how the meds are working, side effects, do you need a refill, etc.) I know I have only seen my -trist 2 x’s because I didn’t like the way he didn’t look at me when I was talking, how he silently wrote in my chart and seemed to want to get out of there as soon as possible.
I hope you find a new DR that will be a huge help to you.
I can’t believe he said that to you!! You do NOT deserve to be treated that way….I hope you are able to find a new doctor.
[...] kind of day. I was starting to wonder if I had entered some kind of netherworld–after Tuesday’s crazy interaction incident and yesterday’s topsy-turvyness. I just needed a normal day today, and I got [...]
Um, I think everyone else has already said it but I just wanted to second their comments. I have seen I think three different counselors (different degrees/titles) at different times in my life; granted never for PPD but still – his crap about your insurance should be on HIS time, not on YOUR time. Meaning, that discussion is not part of your ‘therapy’. Also, his timeframe is nonsense on both counts.
What if a patient was waiting and it took 2 hours to ‘get your information’? He wouldn’t hesitate to tell your your session had ended and it was time to go. And he did nothing by giving you free meds. They weren’t his to give; the reps give them to him, he is just passing them on. He’s a jerk. He may have brought you some distance and that is good, but he sounds really immature.
That was absolutely unprofessional and also very rude. He does not deserve to have you as a patient. I would also report what happened to a supervisor or manager, if he is part of a larger organization.
Jenna, I am so sorry you had to experience that. My jaw dropped when I read his comment, and it makes me angry. You definitely don’t deserve that, and I hope you will get out of there and see a doctor that respects you. Please call Kim Brown. She would NEVER NEVER do that. It is appalling. Good for you for holding your head high.
[...] situation. I’ve been bumming free samples of Effexor XR off my OB/GYN and the totally out-of-line psychiatrist for almost 3 months now. But since I won’t be returning to said rude-to-Jenna psychiatrist, [...]
I feel for you hon. You were so strong not to cry. I was not so lucky. In fact, I cannot sleep because of the way I was treated at my psychiatrist office. I feel like I have been traumatized. I have never felt so disrespected. Should I mention that I was in the military for almost five years, so you can imagine how I was treated there. This office appt. does not even compare. What a waste of money spent on these psychiatrist’s degrees? I am kicking myself for not standing up for myself? Take care dear!! I for one am demanding another doctor.